


because i love you.

by atsirc



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-06-07
Packaged: 2018-04-03 09:05:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4095088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atsirc/pseuds/atsirc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>delphine's pov of the kiss in 3x08.</p>
            </blockquote>





	because i love you.

Everything had frozen around the two of us. With a simple lip tremble, a furrow of the brow, a glossing over of the eyes, the facade that I had kept up over the past weeks leading up to this moment shattered.

There was no DYAD, no Topside, no Clone Club. There was just us: her and me, me and her; and I could deny her no longer - not after her heart-shattering confession. That I had been working all of this time to protect this stupid, idiotic, reckless woman; that all of the decisions I had made up until now to keep her and her sisters safe... That they all could have been worthless. That I could have lost her. That she could have been gone before I had even gotten the chance to hold her in my arms once more.

I suddenly could not stand the distance between the two of us. She was too far away from me, and I ached to sooth the pain that was all too clear in her eyes. For the first time in what felt like forever, I grabbed her without thinking; I did not contemplate the risk, the consequence that would surely follow - I simply did not care. This moment was ours and I was not going to let it fade away.

"Come here," I reached for her face, thumb rubbing circles on her cheek to console the tears back that threatened to fall from her eyes. "Come here" I said again - she was so close, and still not nearly close enough. The walls that had been separating us, for this brief moment at least, had melted. All that remained was the truth, the simple truth that I loved her and she loved me, no matter what happened between us. I pulled her as close as I possibly could, until her lips melded into mine in a gentle but urgent way. Her hands pulled me to, and it confirmed what I already knew: we would end up together. Whatever happens, we will be together in the end, and everything will be okay.

We did not deepen the kiss any further, because we did not need to. All of the love and affection, even the hurt and betrayal, shone through. My mind wandered to that day outside of Felix's apartment, the last time I had seen her so vulnerable and needing confirmation, when she had brokenly said 'I love you' and I had brushed it off. "My love" I whispered between kisses, because she needed to know now that I had never stopped loving her, that she was still mine and I was very much still hers.

And then it all came back. With the thoughts of that day, I remembered suddenly why I had broken it off with her to begin with. Why I had been so cold and even heartless towards her. Why I had guarded myself so much against everyone that I worked with. I was doing this all for her, and even this kiss would not mend the situation we were currently in; at least, not yet.

So I pushed her away. As hard as it was, I pushed her away, because this war that we were fighting in was not over, and it was still my duty to fight for this woman that I loved so much. "I'm sorry. But you should have trusted me." I said to her now. She needed to know how hurt I was, and how betrayed I felt by her, even though I could somewhat understand her actions. 'This is the way things have to be right now', I tried to convey to her, and I think she understood. Because she did not fight me, and she looked hurt as well, but there was a twinkle of understanding in her eyes as she turned and walked out of the room.

This was not over. This was far from over. I gathered myself again, collecting my composure slowly and reminding myself of why I was doing all of this. My walls built back up, and I became cold again. It was a necessity.

I would not lose this woman. Not again.


End file.
